December 2010
41 posts
1 tag
November 2010
57 posts
I think I know why I'm always tired. My dreams are...
I think I’m going to swear off sleep for awhile.
I had a dream there was the big organization set up to kill off families with mental disorders. It was government run but made to look like a food dispensary. If you had a family member afflicted with one of the various disorders they covered you were automatically issued free foods and medical care in their gigantic clinic.
The place was...
I try to be terribly patient with a lot of people, some of those that probably don’t deserve the consideration.
More and more I’m finding some people just have the dumbest things to say to me in a weak attempt at wit. How about you be yourself, drop the act and see if I don’t like you for you?
Baseless snark and “random” witticisms don’t do it for me unless it...
The pimp mother finally got her kids taken away. I’m only counting this as a temporary win. Cops came out Tuesday to take them. They found her oldest (16), the run-away and asked her why she had left. She told them her mothers boyfriend beat her.
They picked her up and took the other two kids.
Turns out the bloody cunt is pregnant.
Anyhow, the cops supposedly tried to piss off her...
WHY THE FUCK IS THAT BABY PIG DRINKING LIQUIFIED...
I am driving all the way to Sherman Oaks just to buy a square pig.
Dear Tidy Cats,
Your litter deodorizer smells like fucking Axe on steroids. I will be suing you for this migraine.
Jerks.
My brothers brother attempted to fix my drums and brakes today. As he went to TOUCH the back passenger side it FELL off. Completely no shit, just fell the fuck off the car with no persuasion required.
NOT terrifying at all.
Only got one side done as we lost daylight by the time he had started. Doing the other side tomorrow, meanwhile, the front brakes are also pretty screwed but can hold on...
I think I found a way to make facebook way more...
I’m going to start blurting out peoples embarrassing middle school nicknames.
Anyone know how long I should wait before I start...
I'm Walking On Rabbits
Having I mentioned my sick, sick love for angora fur? Hey, they’re only shaved rabbits so no crazy PETA stuff, k?
I got these socks yesterday, happened to catch my eye being jet black and boot length. I’m either going to have to start investing in their stock or washing clothes every day. I will not go another cold day without these socks. Seriously.
Is it weird that I don’t...
Dear Customer, (a short rant in letter form)
While I agree that $70 for 2500 business cards is a little much I do have to remind you that this isn’t vistaprint and you aren’t entitled to free shit. I design your cards for FREE. I do 4 or 5 layouts because you don’t know what you want. You take 4 days to get back to me, pick one, change your mind and take another week to get back to me again. You want 500 temps in 2 hours...
4 tags
200 + Responses...
and not one motherfucker knows how to use UPS Worldship.
Fuck me.
I’m not going to worry about it. I’ve got 15 days and enough stress to kill a small herd of zebra (zebras herd, right?). In the next half hour (well… between 8am and 5pm. Jerks) they’re coming to inspect my apartment for reasons completely unknown to me. Last I checked this was NOT a HUD building. The...
Truthful Tuesday
debshock:
aka “even more proof of my total Putzdom”
I have never bothered checking out a podcast because I have no iPod.
Um.
Well, why do they call it a podcast then?
DUH….brb catching up on everybody’s podcasts now.
This is exactly why I hate that goddamn word.
I just saw the craigslist post my boss made for my replacement. It’s so full of bullshit it’s not even funny. What is funny is that one of the first requirements is that you be punctual.
I am the polar opposite of punctual. In fact, we’ve only met a couple times and neither of us were happy with the result.
If punctual were a date, we’d have broken up by dinner.
...
December 2nd!
This time it’s for sure, for sure. Appointment made and everything.
Holy hell do I have a lot of stuff to buy and quick!
Adding to the things I hate about cats list...
I hate that they have no qualms about shitting on MY $20 bolero jacket.
fuck cats.
Making It Up As I Go Along: Proper Syntax →
thatchris:
I’ve always heard women saying, “He really wanted to get into my panties.” That particular phrase has always bugged me.
Technically, what he wants is to get you *out* of your panties.
Unless he literally wants to get physically into your panties. As in, trying them on & gadding about.
If this…
Keep your nuts and bolts, I like being off my...
Current Status:
The boy doesn’t know what to make of the newly cleaned and polished wooden floors.
This is him RIGHT NOW.
