Putting this all together for those that either missed it or couldn’t keep up with my 140 character at a time additions:
I used to live next to my in laws. One night I was watching a porn and this chick was a screamer so I turned the speakers down some, just in case. Anyhow, about 20 minutes into it, I’m doing my thing when the phone rings. My mother in law heard the screaming and thought someone had broken in and was attacking me. I told her I was watching a horror flick, but out of curiosity, she lives next door, why wouldn’t she just come knock on the door? Her answer? She didn’t want to get hurt in case someone WAS beating me and stealing my shit.
For reasons I can’t explain, I think I’ve fallen in love with Hollywood. It’s such a filthy place, the homeless, the addicts, the general malcontents. Assholes in costumes trying to get whatever they can out of tourists from other countries. For every one thing I hate about Hollywood there is at least one thing I love about it. I think if I ever leave the valley, it’ll be the only place I truly miss.
I’ve always loved fingerwaved hair. It always reminds me of jazz, prohibition (and speakeasies), beautiful girls in short skirts dancing and drinking the night away. I swear I was born in the wrong decade save for the lack of womens rights at that point. It’s just so simple yet classy and damn hard to do if you haven’t been taught properly.